Hello from Oakland, California! We’re Adam and Tom, a married couple looking to grow our family through adoption, and we’re both really excited at the thought of becoming parents. We appreciate you taking the time to get to know us better.
Dear Birth Mother
Why Adoption
The two of us have always known that we wanted to have kids. As queer men we both understand that, when it comes to family, the only thing that really matters is love. For us, adoption is an opportunity to build a home and provide a child with everything they need to begin their life’s journey. We’re eager to meet our child and experience the joys and challenges of parenthood together.
Our Story
We met at a mutual friend’s birthday party fourteen years ago. Tom was playing music and Adam thought he looked really cute onstage. We started chatting and found we had a great connection but, as luck would have it, Adam moved across the country to Washington D.C. the next day. The two of us kept in touch and decided to come visit one another and, well, the rest is history. These days, we take pleasure in our home and community, enjoying hikes in the hills and making music. Both of us light up when we see a friend’s child and can’t wait to help our own little one grow and learn about themselves.
About Adam
I’m the oldest of four siblings. Children have always been a big part of my life. I love the natural creativity that kids have, the way they ask simple but imaginative questions that completely defy your expectations. I’m most looking forward to quiet moments with our child when there’s nothing in particular to do and the rest of the world fades away. I'm a writer. Most of my days are spent talking to scientists about their research and then publishing articles in places like Wired, National Geographic, and the New York Times. I’m a freelancer, so my schedule is super flexible. I’ve also written a science-fiction novel and several short stories that I’m working on publishing.
More About Adam, by Tom
Adam is a confident, spontaneous, and capable person who is fascinated by the world around him and devoted to his friends and family. Adam has a sharp and analytical mind but is also a big softie who is deeply moved by art and music. He gets super teary at weddings or when a favorite song comes on. I’m constantly amazed by his ability to remain calm in chaotic situations—he thrives in the kind of hustle and bustle that makes me want to go back to bed. Needless to say, this works in his favor when there are kids around, and it’s always fun to watch him interacting with them.
About Tom
If you were looking for me when I was a kid, I was probably hiding up a tree reading, and books have been one of my most consistent habits ever since. I also was the reason behind the “no singing at the dinner table” rule at my house growing up, and I’ve been lucky enough to do all kinds of music stuff as an adult. I work as a copy writer. I previously worked as a baker in restaurants for many years, which is similarly detail-oriented work but much more tasty. I love cooking for people, and making dinner at home is one of my happy places. I’m looking forward to creating a calm space for our kid to grow up in, surrounded by people who love them.
More About Tom, by Adam
Tom is a kind and gentle person who has a great deal of love in his heart. Tom will go out of his way to help someone in need. One of his favorite activities is cooking a delicious meal and sitting down to eat surrounded by close friends and family. He loves getting outdoors and I know that he’s going to be an amazing dad, pointing out and naming different flowers and trees. Perhaps the thing I’m most looking forward to is seeing what kinds of fun lunch boxes he’s going to prepare for our kids.
Fun Facts About Adam
- Adam hitchhiked around Hawaii and New Zealand after graduating college
- He loves going to the beach with friends
- His favorite author is Italo Calvino
- His favorite video game is SimCity
- He speaks Hebrew and English fluently
- He loves swimming in lakes and rivers
Fun Facts About Tom
- Tom worked as a baker for 11 years
- He inherited a banjo from his great-grandfather
- He loves reading a book indoors when it's raining
- His favorite superhero is Gambit from X-Men
- He's an avid hiker and mountain climber
- His favorite children's books are the Frog and Toad series
Our Home
Our neighborhood in Oakland, California is a peaceful corner of a vibrant city, with friendly and diverse neighbors. We often walk to the park just a few blocks away, which has jungle gyms for kids to play on. We live in a duplex owned by close friends who live downstairs. They have two young children, and we love spending time with their family.
Our Hobbies
We both love cooking, hiking, and working in our vegetable garden. We’re also big readers and our house is always full of books. Tom can’t wait to play music with our kid and take them out in nature. Adam looks forward to sharing in our kid’s curiosity and teaching them how to develop their own understanding of the world.
Our Family
Adam comes from a lively and tightly knit Israeli-American family. His mom lives close by and is super excited to become a grandmother. His younger brother’s family is a five-minute walk away, so it’s easy to spend time together. Adam’s sister was adopted from Vietnam and is now a young professional living in Los Angeles with her parents, Adam’s dad and stepmom. Tom’s mom lives in Oregon and enjoys peaceful time in the garden and reading. His older sister lives in Los Angeles with her wife and likes to join Tom for outdoor adventures in the Sierras. We have a great community of friends in the Bay Area, many with young kids of their own.
Family Traditions
- Swimming at the Yuba River in the summer
- Board game Olympics with Tom's family for Christmas
- Summer road trips with our siblings
- Backpacking in the Sierras
- Adam leading Passover dinner with a rowdy crowd of family and friends
Thoughts on Parenting
We both hope to raise children who will be confident in themselves and connected to the world around them. We want them to know where they came from and use that as a foundation to achieve their dreams. Our household will be filled with love, laughter, music, and art, and provide a peaceful place for our child to pursue whatever brings them happiness. We can’t wait to hold our child and see them smile for the first time.
Lessons We Will Teach Your Child
- How to bake the best brownies
- How to grow and shell fava beans
- How to recognize the constellations at night
- How to have empathy for others
- How to paint with watercolors
In Closing - Thank You
Thank you for considering us in this decision. It can't be an easy one to make. We promise that if you choose us, we will do everything in our power to care for your child and surround them with love.
~ Adam and Tom